“Which alters when it alteration finds,

Or bends with the remover to remove”

– William Shakespeare (Sonnet 116)

I have this memory of travelling with a friend of mine, back to our hometown on a bus, it was a good few years ago………. We exchanged our iPods for fun…….

But for the life of me I cannot remember the song which played on my friend’s iPod that day……

I used to be good in remembering little things like that……. but now I guess I am growing old and senile…

What I remember though, is the song I made my friend listen to on mine…..

23 ~ Jimmy Eat World

There was something about this song…… a self recognition….an identity…….something methophorical…… Yes back then I was 22 , soon to turn 23……

“No one else will know these lonely dreams
No one else will know that part of me”

People always say how predictable I can be……no surprises……. anyone who knows me, pretty much could tell what would be my next move…… but somehow I very much doubt that…..

“I’m still driving away
And I’m sorry every day”

3 years on I have no regrets…… I feel no need to either justify or reconcile with the past…..

“I wont always love these selfish things
I wont always live not stopping”

At 22 I was, in my very own standards what I call reckless…… I always lived and was swayed by the moment……

“Amazing still it seems
I’ll be 23
I wont always love what I’ll never have
I wont always live in my regrets”

By 23 I had learned not to live by regrets…. I became cautious…..now I live to play by the rules….

But still there is this naivety left in me……..call me a sentimental fool……..I still look at the world through a pair of rose-tinted glasses…..

So yes I understand why people say I am predictable….. but am I? I agree I am not volatile anymore…. that I have the safe choice is the best choice strategy on basically everything…. from the food that  I eat to the clothes that I wear…..

“You’ll sit alone forever
If you wait for the right time
What are you hoping for?”

The truth is I am not hoping for anything……. I am one of those people who live life from day to day……not being able to tell the difference between one day from the other….. Content with knowing all that I know, which is not much, trust me on that one.

“Holding on tight
Dont give away the end
The one thing that stays mine…”

But what I have is an idea, an idea of a dream…..my dream…..and I am not settling for anything less…

Just for this once…….I am not going to take the easy way out…..

just because it is easy……..